It was a Friday. Dressed in a non-business outfit, i set off to office on my bike pretty late in the morning and sped across the traffic. It was close to 11:30 AM when i reached the AMM school signal on the kotturpuram road. I was one of the first to dart off the signal when it turned green and was flanked by two bikers. All of us at nothing less than 65 Km/hr.
Trying to inch ahead of them, i revved a little and in the process failed to notice the two men in the distance. By the time i realized that the men were really cops waiting to intercept speeding vehicles and fine them, it was too late. One of them, a constable, pointed his lathi stick at me and gestured me to stop by the side of the road. To this day, i'm surprised how the two bodyguards that were besides me managed to escape the constable's vision, though they were travelling as fast as i was and were also committing a violation as much as i was. Whoever they are, they were one hell of a lucky baskars !! (Yes, i did mean b#%&*). And i was not.
I stopped and parked the bike on the side of the road as i was asked to. There was a Sergeant standing by his bike and ready with a fine book, in a generous mood to dish out fines.
Though it looked very obvious why i was stopped for, with a hope that it wasn't for speeding I questioned the constable the reason for being stopped. He didn't beat around the bush - was spot on.
Cons - where are you working ?
Me - Software engr in XYZ company.
Cons - where is your licence ?
I promptly show my licence to him and he takes it into his possession and proceeds to ask.
Cons - Why were you travelling at that speed ? Should have been close to 70 !
Me - who me ? No i didn't (amazing.... i can lie). i can barely touch 50 on this... (Oh, i can lie without batting an eyelid !!)
Sergeant jumps in...
Sergeant - What non-sense? Shall i ride it at 70 and show it to you ?
I smiled sheepishly. I know it was a bad start to say my 125cc bike wouldn't cross 50 kph.
I didn't wanna give up. I remembered one of my friends telling me that cops usually will have their speed guns to track speedsters and show the speed on it as an evidence. These guys didn't seem to have one. I questioned.....
Me - You don't seem to have a speed gun. how do you say that i was going at 70 kph ?
Sergeant - We don't need speed guns to figure out your speed. We have enough experience to do that with our naked eye. Can you do that ? Now look ! there is a guy in white in the distance, on his bike. Tell me his speed.
Me - No, i don't see him (Trying to be non co-operative)
Sergeant - You can't see him ?! Then you must be blind, ha ha ha !. You are not even fit to drive then...... ha ha.
That's very funny Mr A**H*** !! What does this guy want with me ? why am i being f#&*^ up like this ?
Me - Tell me what the fine is ?
Sergeant - That's more like it. Spot fine is Rs 400.
Me - What ? 400 ? I don't have that much !! Look at my purse..... [i open my purse and show him. It has a few 10 rupee notes]
Sergeant - Then go get it. Don't bother trying to fool me again.
I could only think of an ATM near the signal that i crossed.
Me - I need to go to the ATM and bring the money.
The Cons is reluctant to let me off, but the Sergeant agrees.
Sergeant - You better get back quickly, remember.... we have your licence !
Having no choice, i U-turn at the signal ahead (opp Cancer Institute) and i head for the ATM, wondering how bad the day could be than this one. Unwillingly i collect the 400 bucks from my savings account and returned back to the spot i was caught. There were more people by now that have fallen prey. Nothing short of a feast for the policemen!!
The constable was standing alone and i approach him and tell him that i have the fine amount. He tells me to go to the sergeant and pay it to him. The sergeant is busy chiding someone who was caught speeding. When he's done with it, i just moved closer and stood before him. He filled up the receipt for the spot fine and asked me to sign at its bottom. I signed and waited for him to ask for the money.
He didn't. He took the licence from his bike bag and gave it to me and cautioned me to avoid this in the future. Duh ? Who's gonna take this money ? Doesn't anybody want this ? Maybe he thought i would have given the fine amount to the constable or may be he forgot that he's yet to take it from me !! Whatever, who cares !! With a wicked smile, i just turned around and literally did a houdini, with a disappearing act.....Off i go on my bike, naughtily giggling all the way to office. Couldn't help feel for the poor soul that's gonna be torn to pieces by the sergeant, when he realizes how he's been fooled and looks for a insect that he can shed all this anger on.
Ta
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